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Checklists for Conflict Conversation

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Example Checklists (5)

1
Standard Conflict Conversation
2
Conflict Between Employees
3
Dealing with Defensive Employees
4
Conflict Regarding Misconduct
5
Repeated Conflict Conversation
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Standard Conflict Conversation

This checklist provides a universal guide for leaders to conduct conflict conversations in a structured and results-oriented manner. It is applicable when a conflict situation arises between employees or between a leader and an employee, requiring clarification regardless of the specific cause.

Progress: 0/15 (0%)

1Preparation

Collect facts, data, and observations; avoid rumors or interpretations.
What should be achieved by the end of the conversation? Clarification, resolution, behavior change?
Ensure an undisturbed environment, sufficient time, and no distractions.
How might the other person react and how will I handle that?

2Beginning of the Conversation

Radiate calmness, signal appreciation, clearly state the purpose of the conversation.
Objectively and neutrally describe the observations or the reason for the conversation without judgment.
Specifically inquire about the other person's viewpoint and actively listen.

3Main Part of the Conversation

Paraphrase, summarize, and address feelings to show understanding.
Express your own perceptions and feelings instead of making accusations ('I see...', 'I am concerned...').
Collaboratively seek ways to resolve the conflict or change future behavior.
If necessary, clearly articulate expectations regarding behavior or consequences for non-compliance.

4Conclusion and Follow-Up

Document agreements made, next steps, and responsibilities.
Ensure that both parties understand and agree to the agreements.
If necessary, agree on a time to review the implementation.
Analyze your own behavior and the course of the conversation to learn for future discussions.

Conflict Between Employees

This checklist helps leaders to mediate conflicts between two or more employees. The challenge is to remain neutral, consider all perspectives, and facilitate a mutual solution without taking sides or dictating the answer.

Progress: 0/13 (0%)

1Preparation

Speak separately with each party involved in the conflict beforehand to understand their viewpoint and gather facts.
Be aware of and set aside personal biases or sympathies.
The aim is to de-escalate the situation and develop a joint, sustainable solution through the participants themselves.

2Conducting the Conversation

Bring all parties together and establish ground rules for the discussion (allowing each person to speak, no personal attacks).
Give each party the space to present their viewpoint without interruptions from others. Encourage active listening.
Name and validate feelings, but steer the focus back to the issue at hand ('I see that you are angry. What specifically is bothering you?').
Identify points of agreement or areas where misunderstandings can be clarified.

3Finding Solutions

Ask how the parties wish to resolve the conflict instead of proposing solutions yourself ('What do you suggest to prevent this from happening in the future?').
Encourage brainstorming for potential solutions and evaluate the pros and cons.
Document specific, verifiable actions and behaviors that are accepted by all.

4Follow-Up

Record important points in writing and distribute to all involved parties.
To check on the adherence to the agreements and clarify any outstanding issues.
Monitor whether the situation improves or if further interventions are needed.

Dealing with Defensive Employees

This checklist assists managers in conducting conversations with employees who respond defensively, dismissively, or even aggressively to feedback or conflict discussions. The goal is to break through the defensive posture and enable constructive communication.

Progress: 0/13 (0%)

1Preparation

Gather facts and specific observations that justify why the conversation is necessary.
Ensure that you approach the conversation calmly, factually, and non-aggressively.
How might the employee respond (minimization, counterattack, victim role), and how will I respond?

2Conducting the Conversation

Value the employee as a person, highlighting positive aspects before addressing the issue.
Express your own perceptions and feelings ('I am concerned because...', 'I observe that...').
Refer to facts and observations, allowing no interpretations or generalizations.
Be open to the employee's perspective, asking for their reasons ('What is your view of the situation?').

3Dealing with Defense

Do not become defensive in the face of counterattacks or excuses; steer the conversation back to the topic.
Directly address unacceptable behavior (e.g., insults, denial of facts) and specify consequences.
Encourage the employee to reflect on their role in the situation ('What do you think you could do differently?').

4Conclusion and Next Steps

What needs to change? Who will do what by when? (e.g., 'We agree that you will... from now on.').
Clearly communicate what steps will follow if the agreements are not adhered to, if relevant.
Despite the difficulty, express trust in the employee's ability to change their behavior.

Conflict Regarding Misconduct

This checklist is designed for leaders to conduct conversations when an employee has clearly exhibited misconduct that violates company policies, team rules, or legal regulations. The focus is on clearly identifying the misconduct, the consequences, and the expectations for future behavior.

Progress: 0/14 (0%)

1Preparation

Date, time, location, involved parties, detailed description of the incident, witnesses, and gather evidence.
Which company policy, rule, or regulation was violated? What consequences are specified?
If necessary, coordinate with HR or the legal department regarding possible/necessary employment law actions.
Set aside anger or disappointment to remain factual and professional.

2Start of Conversation

Immediately and unambiguously state the purpose of the meeting ('I am addressing you today regarding the incident on...').
Describe the misconduct objectively and without judgment, based on the collected facts.
Give the employee the opportunity to express themselves and present their perspective, without accepting it as an excuse.

3Main Part of the Conversation

Clearly state the impact of the misconduct on the team, the company, or customers.
Clearly outline what behavior is expected in the future and which rules apply.
If necessary, clearly and precisely communicate the employment law consequences (e.g., warning, termination).
Encourage the employee to take responsibility for their actions.

4Conclusion and Documentation

Clearly repeat the agreements made or the expectations for future behavior.
Record key points, the misconduct, discussed consequences, and agreements in writing.
If necessary, plan a follow-up meeting for review or further actions.

Repeated Conflict Conversation

This checklist is designed for managers who need to conduct a conflict conversation again because previously made agreements were not adhered to or problematic behavior has recurred. The focus is on confronting the repetition, analyzing the causes, and initiating more consistent measures.

Progress: 0/15 (0%)

1Preparation

Thoroughly go through the minutes of the previous conversation and the agreements made at that time.
Gather specific examples and facts of the renewed misconduct or non-compliance.
What further escalation steps or labor law measures are appropriate and necessary now?
Consciously control your own emotions to remain professional and objective.

2Beginning of Conversation

Make it clear that this is a repeat conversation and that the situation is serious ('We have already discussed this issue...').
Directly and unequivocally point out the non-compliance with previous agreements or the recurring problem.
Ask why the agreements were not followed or why the behavior recurred ('What has happened since our last conversation?').

3Analysis and Confrontation

Specifically ask about underlying reasons, considering external factors without accepting excuses.
Clearly illustrate the negative impacts of the recurrence and name the already existing or new consequences.
Directly confront the employee with their responsibility for adhering to the agreements.
Make it clear that this may be the last chance or that further steps are inevitable.

4Conclusion and Next Steps

Make very specific, measurable, and time-bound new agreements.
In case of renewed non-compliance, clearly state the exact next steps (e.g., warning, reassignment, termination).
Put the agreements and the consequences in writing and have the employee sign (if possible/sensible).
Establish more frequent checks on behavior or adherence to agreements.

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